Anxious attachment can be classified as one of the three core attachment styles as put forward by attachment theory which explains how people make emotional connections, as well as how they seek closeness in relationships. People characterized with an anxious attachment style tend to have higher feelings of insecurity, fear of abandonment and craving closeness with others. Knowing how those who possess an anxious attachment endure what they do, as well as how their friends, family, or partners can intervene is vital in guaranteeing people uneventful and satisfying relationships.

What is Anxious Attachment?

More often than not, people with an anxious attachment style tend to alternate between being preoccupied or obsessing over their partner, simultaneously lacking self-respect or self-love. They are likely to constantly be anxious regarding their partner’s fidelity, or that other close relationships may be lost. This is a result of behaviors such as:

Clinginess: Individuals who have an anxious attachment are likely to get engulfed by their partners, leading both partners to feel a sense of being trapped.

Jealousy: They may at times be prone to jealousy and insecurity over their partners’ commitments and constantly feel suspect of their partners’ faithfulness

Overthinking: Individuals may sometimes overanalyze their partner’s actions or words and make incorrect conclusions about the situation.

Fear of Rejection: Abandonment issues may result in high anxiety levels and great difficulty in committing to a relationship.

The Emotional Impact of Anxiously Attached Individuals

Being constantly worried of separation is quite painful for many individuals. This worrying nature also results in:

Anxious Preoccupation: There is constant over-effort to attain partners’ affection, and their absence causes strong feelings of sadness and tension.

Hope Deficits: People who experience anxious attachment often feel unimportant as a cause to their lack of hope and self-worth.

Dependency and Lack of Choices: Such a requirement to seek validation to a great extent makes it hard to make independent choices that eventually results in unhappiness.

How Can Friends and Family Help?

In scenarios where an individual has an anxious attachment style, family and friends’ help is required to be steady, seeing the reasoning accompanied by a reminder and integrating this consistently in communication. Some of the things one can do are the following:

Offer Assurance: Make sure to provide affirmations regularly. Communication of even simple words like “I’m here for you” or “You are important to me” help eliminate their fears.

Assist in Having Conversations: Help foster an environment where they can freely express their feelings and concerns. Tell them that no thoughts can be too much.

Practice Patience: Appreciate that such reactions are most probably due to their attachment style and not the current relationship with you. Remain patient as they will require more time in processing their feelings.

Establish Healthy Boundaries: While it is good to be there for someone, it is also wise to draw a line somewhere. This ensures that both people in the relationship feel safe and respected.

Encourage Self-Care: Self-care activities that could also foster emotional independence and in turn raise their self-esteem can be suggested to them. They could be engaging in mindfulness practices, hobbies or even therapy.

Study Together: Read any books or other materials about attachment theory with them. Knowing how the experience of anxious attachment works in practice can help alleviate anxiety for both partners within the two.